In my work over the last 9 years, working with transformational leaders and coaches I have been able to practice, refine, learn, and personally understand and embody the nature of magnetically creating clients.
One of my clients recently shared “I just intuitively knew that you (Chris) were the right coach for me because I knew you had already embodied the qualities who I was looking to be”.
So it’s my pleasure to share my insights on the topic of ‘Being Magnetic’.
Let’s start by asking…
“What are prospects actually seeking?”
In simple service-based transactions that are delivering a done-for-you service like a landscaper or a web designer, what clients are looking for is trust in the capability to deliver a specific tangible result.
In the transformational leadership coaching I do, it’s very different…
What I am actually supporting my clients to achieve is the embodiment of new internal states of being, such as; confidence, compassionate leadership, self-belief, happiness, peace, certainty, love, connection, and comfort. These states of being, then give my clients the ability to more effortlessly, powerfully, sustainably and confidently create the tangible results they desire.
So what is Magnetism?
What a prospect intuitively senses as attraction is caused by the magnetism produced by the Service provider already possessing the EXPERTISE and QUALITIES of being that they desire.
So, how do you become a magnet to your prospects?
You can’t fake magnetism. It is present at the level of energy, meaning it is a very real force of nature.
In order for a prospect to feel magnetically attracted to you, you need to understand 9 dimensions of being.
1. COMPASSION IS KING
Prospects want to know that you are a compassionate leader. They want to know you won’t judge their flaws and struggles. The compassion you embody leads to an unconscious feeling that you are a very safe person to connect with. Without safety, people are guarded about revealing their vulnerabilities and they will never fully feel safe enough to let their guard down to be able to truly receive the support they need. Prospects want to feel safe before they expose themselves and their problems to a stranger. This safety allows deep intimacy, connection, value, possibility and trust to be present in the relationship.
Prospects want to know you have reverence for the pain and struggles they are going through. Reverence goes beyond compassion… Reverence is about honoring and accepting the struggle the prospect is going through IS a valid and ‘normal’ part of the journey. Whenever you speak about their struggle with disdain or criticism, they intuitively sense you are judging them and end up feeling guarded. Judgment of the problem at any level creates separation and disconnection between you and your prospects. Reverence cannot be faked. When you address the problem with your prospects in your teachings, content or conversation, be sure to be the one who honors their struggle. Be loving towards the problem, not self-righteous or superior than thou.
For those looking for deeper mastery, In order to truly embody this, you need to honor and LOVE your own struggle.
3. SAFETY FIRST
The combined effect of COMPASSION and REVERENCE is that Prospects will feel SAFE. They know you are not the kind of person to exploit their insecurities or pain to gain an advantage or to manipulate them into buying something that isn’t good for them.
I notice quite fear-based content marketing posts with people subtly judging the problem or covertly shaming people who have a problem, and this creates an unconscious level of resistance in people to reach out because prospects sense your judgment, and it doesn’t create safety.
They want to know you require a full-bodied YES from both sides before you work with them. You need to be willing to say NO to those prospects who do not meet the minimum requirements. When you become committed to saying NO to anything that is less than a ‘FULL-BODIED YES’, you create space inside your life for the universe to bring in more aligned possibilities. Let your prospects know you only work with people who you feel deep resonance with. Rest in the trust that the universal laws reward those who operate from the principles of alignment and resonance.
5. INFINITE POSSIBILITY
You must have cultivated a belief that what your clients want is possible. You need to have anchored a deep KNOWING that all clients have the potential to create what they desire. If you doubt the possibility to create, this is your opportunity to go deeper into your own limitations and the misunderstandings you have about the power of the human spirit and the creative magic of the universe. Cultivate this in yourself for your own life by addressing every limiting belief and every limiting way of being that limits you. If you don’t believe in yourself, it can be challenging to be able to believe in others. It’s not always easy shifting limiting beliefs, and that’s why working with a coach is the fastest way I know to shift limiting beliefs.
6. UNCONDITIONAL SERVICE
Prospects want to directly experience the expertise you have. This translates to them knowing first hand you are VALUABLE to them. Prospects want to know firsthand that you are an expert that they can trust to provide insight into the bigger picture all the way to the details, with the ability to add layered nuances in understanding as well as offer tools and processes to take prospects deeper than ever before. Unconditional service does not mean giving all your time away to anybody who asks for your time….. You need to be truly discerning about who you choose to give your time and energy to. Create strong boundaries based on solid criteria that ensure you speak with people who are suitably qualified and value what you do. Having boundaries gives you the willingness to say NO to people that don’t align with you or meet your minimum qualifying standards. When you feel good about the prospect commitment, when you do decide to give them your time, you can do so without expectation. Strong boundaries allow you to BE UNCONDITIONALLY OF SERVICE to those who you choose.
7. NEED NOTHING
The best approach is to have no expectations about whether a prospect is going to work with you. Thinking about whether they will say yes or no is an irrelevant distraction that gets in the way of you truly serving them. Plus, expectations are a form of attachment that is rooted in FEAR-based thinking coming from a sense of LACK that is projected as you NEEDING something from your prospect. Selling conversations are awkward or uncomfortable when you have expectations that a client should say yes to you. Yes, letting go of expectations that a prospect becomes your client may be one of the toughest things you ever do in your life, but it will also liberate you and counterintuitively will help you create more clients.
8. HELP THEM MAKE THE BEST DECISION FOR THEM
Choose to cultivate a commitment to their highest good, and let go of your own ideas about their decision. Clients can feel neediness a mile away. Let go of all your expectations, including that they SHOULD work with you. Have respect for the fact that only the prospect KNOWS whether working with you is right for them. Replace your expectations for closing the sale with a commitment to serving their highest good and feel the sweetness of being unconditionally committed to them and helping them make the best decision for them.
9. YOUR EMBODIMENT IS YOUR GREATEST ASSET
When you only have a conceptual or intellectual grasp of something, your power as a leader or coach is limited. Your power to transmit this is weak because there is a lack of wisdom behind your words. Embodying the words you are speaking, allows you to speak with a deeper frequency that allows the information to land at deeper levels.
When you share from a place of embodiment, the quality of communication shifts from sharing Intellectual Knowledge to Embodied Wisdom.
This shift to sharing embodied wisdom is the hallmark of being magnetic.
How do you be more magnetic to your prospects?
MORE DEEPLY EMBODY THE QUALITIES THEY ARE SEEKING
But first, you need to know what is most important to your clients.
Then you need to be clear about who YOU NEED TO BE for them.
HERE ARE THE KEY QUESTIONS TO ASK TO BECOME A MORE MAGNETIC TO YOUR POTENTIAL CLIENTS…
1. What embodied qualities in you will help them achieve their results?
2. What qualities in you are they looking to learn from you?
3. What qualities do your clients require in you to say yes to you?