Chris Jackson Coaching

Ep #14: Secrets to developing emotional mastery

Good evening guys, happy transformation Tuesday. Chris Jackson here coming to you live, if you guys are watching the replay, hello. If you guys are coming to me live right now, appreciate your comments, give me some love, say hello. Tonight I\’m going to diving deep into emotional mastery, Hey May, how you doing Dora, how you guys doing? Tonight\’s emotional mastery, this is the mother skill, this is the ultimate skill to become a professional human, to get results in life to transform my reality, to have high quality relationships to earn more money, this is the ultimate skill to have. Hey Dora and so I\’m going to be distilling what is emotional mastery, what is emotional intelligence, hey Heidi, how you guys doing? Good to have you here. What is emotional mastery, how do we cultivate high levels of emotional intelligence, what is emotional intelligence, was it important and the most important thing is how do we improve it, how do we boost it, because the great thing about emotional mastery and emotional intelligence is that we can boost it through the roof, our emotional intelligence and our emotional mastery is a skill set. It is a skill set, so it\’s different from IQ and I\’ll explain a bit more about how it\’s different from IQ, the benefits of emotional mastery, the benefits of emotional intelligence, and I\’m going to dive in and dive into adding value to you guys, because this is going to change the game for you, this going to change your results, this is going to improve your income, this is going to improve your relationships, this is going your productivity, this goes across the board, so this is a powerful topic, and I\’m excited as you can tell. This is a game changer, when I discovered emotional intelligence and how to improve our emotional intelligence, massive differences across every single dimension of my life so without further ado, let\’s dive into, well what is a martial intelligence, and I\’m going to use the word emotional intelligence and emotional mastery interchangeably here, there is some subtle differences, but let\’s just go with that for now, this is a huge topic, if I was going to this topic justice, this would be probably a five-day workshop, so we\’re just going to keep this really shortly, probably 20 minutes tonight, I\’m going to go deep. So emotional intelligence, the definition I\’m using for emotional intelligence is it\’s a measure of your ability to sense, to understand and effectively apply the power and acumen of your emotions and the emotions of others in order to facilitate high levels of collaboration and productivity. What the hell does that mean? Well, to put it simply, it\’s the ability to get shit done, it\’s the ability to master our life, it\’s the ability to communicate, the ability for us to not only get stuff done for ourselves, but also influence and contribute and collaborate with others, so it\’s the master skill. Now going to I\’m going to give you some stats, and I want to give you some examples here of what is and what is not, so EQ is totally different to IQ. Your IQ which is completely different, your IQ is more to do with how you actually process cognitively, logically, analytically, whereas emotional intelligence is totally different, it\’s our awareness of our own emotions, it\’s awareness of our understanding of how we do emotion, what emotion we\’re experiencing, so it\’s a it\’s a culmination of different factors which is totally different, we\’re using a whole different part of our brain, a whole different skill set, and I\’m going to expand into what I mean in more detail as we go through. So your EQ is different from IQ, because your EQ can improve, you can grow your EQ very easily. You\’re emotional intelligence can improve, and again the way that you measure EQ is based on a points based system. So your EQ will go up by a point when you improve your ability to understand yourself, your ability to be aware of your emotions, your ability to control your emotions, your ability to communicate your emotions, your ability to understand emotions, so you can actually measure your EQ in the same way you can measure your IQ, so both of these have tests that you can tell what your IQ and when your EQ is. Your EQ is what\’s driving all of your decisions, your EQ is what\’s driving your behaviour, your motivation, the mood that you\’re in comes down to your EQ, your awareness of the mood that you\’re in, your ability to transform your emotion, the ability to transform your mood, this is all emotional intelligence. EQ has nothing to do with IQ, IQ reaches its peak roughly around about your late teens, so by the time 19, 20 years, your EQ, your IQ rather has essentially plateaued, cause it\’s your cognitive ability to process information, process data, solve complex problems, that\’s your IQ. Your EQ is unlimited, your EQ is uncapped, you can keep boosting your EQ through the roof, and just like Carol Dweck talks about in her book, Mindset, in terms of the growth mindset. So the growth mindset has been proven beyond a shadow of doubt that you can enhance your EQ, you can enhance your emotional control, you can enhance your emotional mastery when you start thinking new thoughts, when you start taking new behaviour, so you can grow your emotional intelligence exponentially, you can grow up through the roof, and I\’ve had experience of clients that have taken an EQ test and then six months later, their EQ, their growth in EQ has been phenomenal, it\’s been like a 20 point increase, 30 point increase in emotional intelligence which is huge. The reason why that\’s important is that Forbes magazine have done, hey Danny, good to see you again mate, Forbes magazine have done studies on EQ, and what they\’ve found is is a direct correlation between EQ and your income. Direct correlation which is really really interesting because the higher your EQ, the greater your income, the greater your earning capacity and what they found for every EQ point increase, every percent, or every one point that your EQ goes up by, that correlates to a 1750 dollar increase in your salary per year, so there\’s huge benefits here that they\’ve proven through studies about the benefits and a direct correlations between income and EQ, so really important stuff. Now EQ is awesome, Forbes magazine also found that EQ was the single biggest predictor of performance in the workplace. So yeah, hey Heidi, yeah that\’s fantastic, this is really important and unfortunately we never really get told this at school well, this really isn\’t in the public domain, you don\’t see TV ads on ABC news tonight, you\’re not seeing, hey there\’s a report published by Forbes magazine that tells you how great EQ can help you improve your salary, doesn\’t happen, unfortunately this just isn\’t in the public domain, so that\’s why I\’m really excited to share this with you, so EQ is the single biggest predictor of performance in the workplace as well, so then again they\’ve done studies on high performance and what they found is that it\’s also the strongest driver of leadership and it\’s also the biggest predictor of personal excellence so this someone\’s competency at their job, it\’s directly correlated. So let\’s take a look at, now that we\’re sort of understanding why EQ is important, let\’s look at well, what is it. So what is EQ? Well EQ, emotional intelligence, it consists of five major pillars. Now these five pillars, a combination of internal factors as well as external factors, so what do I mean? Well, the first major pillar is self awareness, the second major pillar is self regulation, third major pillar is our motivation, the fourth is empathy and the fifth is social skills. So I\’m going to explain and unpack what do I mean by all these aspects because these are really important. Well, self awareness, self regulation and motivation, these are the internal factors, so this is our internal awareness, and our ability to transform, and be aware of and shift our emotions, our emotional awareness. Hey Maria good to see you here, how are you? So self awareness, it\’s the ability to recognise and understand your moods, your emotions, your drives and their effect on others. So your self awareness is critical, if you don\’t have awareness of what you\’re experiencing, the emotions that you\’re experiencing, then good luck, if we don\’t understand what the emotion is that we\’re experiencing, how we\’re experiencing it, and we\’re not able to label it, and say this is what I\’m experiencing, it\’s very disempowering, and this is being observed in the prison system. a lot of inmates, because they don\’t have a high degree of emotional awareness, of self awareness, what they\’ve found is because they didn\’t have a word for what they\’re experiencing, which might have been anger or guilt or shame or whatever, because they didn\’t have a word to accurately label that emotion they\’re experiencing, they just rounded it to whatever the closest thing they could experience was which they thought it would, which for most people was anger. Anger is a common one, and that\’s why there\’s a lot of violence, and this why there\’s a lot of people that are violently reacting with anger, because they simply haven\’t got the word to describe what they might be experiencing, hey Diddy. Good to see you here, Chad, so they might have been experiencing shame, it could have been guilt, might have been sadness, it might have been something, because they didn\’t have the vocabulary or the ability to discern and become aware of what they\’re experiencing, that just felt angry, so they would just take it out with violence, so again this is a classic example of your vocabulary and your awareness of what emotion you\’re experiencing are so incredibly important, because you\’re able to diagnose what is the record, you\’re able to diagnose what I\’m actually experiencing right now rather than just a general discomfort or a general sense of unease. Misalignment, you can be very very specific what is that emotion you\’re experiencing? Is it guilt, is it shame, is it hurt, is it sadness, is it resentment, what is it? Very very powerful when you become aware of the language of how you define your experience because our experience is to a large degree, it\’s created through language whether you use the word, I\’m angry, or whether I\’m a bit peeved off, huge emotional difference there, so the language that you\’re using to describe what you\’re experiencing, describe your experience creates your experience. So the availability and the diversity of language and also at the degree of positivity versus negativity of the language you have available is also going to determine to a large degree your experience of life. I know I did this for a while, you know when you go to the check out, you know you go to buy something, people always ask you, how you going, how\’s your day, it\’s just a lot of small talk, and what I did was I substituted the normal standard response, which is a good, I\’m having an okay day, I replaced all my vocabulary with extreme versions of that, like I said I was unstoppable, they said, \”how you going Chris?\”, \”I\’m unstoppable, I\’m feeling great, \”I\’m feeling incredible, I\’m feeling amazing\”, and when you actually express and you actually say that word, you actually get that emotion available to you, so you can actually transform your experience in the moment by using a different word as well, so there\’s is a lot of this phenomenal powerful tools you can use and this is called transformational vocabulary, when you\’re able to transform all of your words, transform your vocabulary, you shift your whole entire experience of life. So that\’s self awareness, the second major pillar is self regulation, and this is your ability to regulate your emotions, this is the ability to control or redirect or to redistribute your impulses and the moods and your propensity to suspending judgement and think before acting, so instead of being reactionary, you can actually start to regulate, \”Hang on what\’s this emotion I\’m experiencing, \”do I want to experience it?\” Is it a resourceful emotion, is it a not so resourceful emotion, do I want to shift it, do I want to experience it, so when you become aware of it, you can then decide, well, how much do you want to indulge that emotion, is it resourceful, is it unresourceful, so really really powerful awareness, the third aspect of the internal aspects of emotional intelligence is motivation. Now this is a passion to work beyond reasons for just money and status and it\’s the propensity to pursue goals, so with a sense of energy and persistence, so motivation is one of these critical drivers of performance in life. So drop a comment if you can remember ever relate to having a lack of motivation or just procrastinating or something like that, well the experience that you were having was you were lacking the emotion of motivation, so the internal drive to do something, to move forward, that is created through the emotion of motivation, so motivation is very very powerful emotion to feel, \’cause you don\’t have any motivation, there\’s no movement, there\’s no inspiration, there\’s no action, there\’s no doing, so motivation is incredibly powerful, so they\’re the three major pillars, the internal components of emotional intelligence to start with, thanks for the love guys, appreciate you guys, you guys are awesome. The next, love the hearts, the next aspect of the external components in terms of us observing emotions in our external world. The fourth pillar is empathy. So empathy is the ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people, so we need to be aware of, we\’ve got to, we simply must be aware of what are the emotions that people around me are experiencing, because if we\’re not tuned into their emotions, we miss out on a huge element of connecting with people, all right, so say for example if you\’re rocking up in a relationship and your partner\’s disenchanted or frustrated or something\’s going on in their world you\’re able to pick up on something\’s up with them and they don\’t always feel comfortable or confident in sharing that, if you\’re not able to pick up on that, then kind of it\’s obliviousness, it\’s disempowerment, \’cause it\’s now well I got no idea what your emotion experiences is, so I am now disconnected with you, so empathy and having an understanding whatever someone else is experiencing is so important in order to be a leader, in order to be a friend , in order to communicate, we got to know what\’s that person experiencing, to know well how do I approach this communication. Thanks Danny, love, love, love hearts. So we got to understand, but what\’s their experience, what\’s their emotions, so I know how do I approach this, do I need to go in with some compassion, do I need to go in with some humour, do I need to approach this, maybe I need to give them some space, who knows. So this is where we have that emotional awareness of someone else\’s emotional state so incredibly powerful, now we don\’t always know that, now this is where it\’s a skill, we have to cultivate this, the awareness of someone else\’s emotions is a skill, now to a degree, sometimes we\’re mindreading, but what we got to then do is through communication skills, through rapport, understanding body language, we can now start to pick up on what\’s actually going on in their internal world. Good stuff Danny, love it brother. Now the fifth pillar is social skills. Now social skills is our proficiency in managing relationships, and building relationships, so again, success in life is built on relationships. Right. It\’s built around understanding, and I mean people like these people, so if we don\’t know people, then we don\’t know life, and for those of you that are in business, business is built on relationships, so if you don\’t know relationships, if you don\’t know business, you\’re out of business, if you don\’t know, if you don\’t know how to build relations with people, then you\’re out of business really really quickly, so this is critical. Hey, I got a question here, it\’s not just about understanding ourselves, also understanding others. Yeah, there\’s two parts to emotional intelligence, there\’s understanding ourselves, and there\’s also understanding the emotional makeup of someone else, so you might be really really good at understanding yourself and the emotional quotient assessment that you can do which is a report where you get a series of questions, and it gives you a percentage, gives you rankings in each of these five pillars of emotional intelligence, it actually tells you how you scoring, so some people are stronger internally, other people are stronger externally, some people are really really strong in social skills, and being empathetic, they can see what\’s going on with someone else but I can\’t see what\’s going on inside themselves so great for relationships in terms of being present for the people they care about, however not so good for themselves. So this is where we need to have discernment and awareness of where we\’re strong within each of these five pillars of our emotional intelligence. Now the key thing you need to recognise is the reason why we\’ve been having this conversation in the first place is because when we have mastery, when we have emotional mastery, mastery of our emotions, we\’re able to create powerful results across all the different dimensions of our life, because as I said before, without motivation, there\’s no action, our emotions are creating our actions. Now let\’s dive in and understand how this is actually playing out, because what we\’re actually doing is we are starting with our whole entire mindset, that\’s the thing that\’s driving, that\’s the starting point, our mindset, our believe system, the way that we view our reality, our model of the world, that\’s the very starting point. From there, we then go to thoughts, that generates thoughts from that, the thoughts generate emotions, then the emotions generate the decisions, and then the decisions generate the actions, the actions generate the results, so we go back, all the way back up the chain, and what we going to find is the emotions are driving the decisions, but going back there, well what preceded the emotion, well there was a thought that we fired off in our brain, that created the emotion, well what creates the thought, well our model of the world, which is our level of awareness, it\’s our consciousness, it\’s our values, it\’s our belief systems, it\’s all the past experiences in our lives, it\’s all about, it\’s our language, it\’s all the decisions and the belief systems that we\’ve cultivated and curated through our whole entire upbringing, so we need to go back all the way back up the chain, and go okay, well there\’s my whole entire model of the world that\’s now driving my thoughts, my emotions, my decisions, my actions, my results, so emotional intelligence sort of sits in somewhere here, somewhere here around awareness, that then, it\’s a skill, however it\’s only half the game, actually it\’s probably not even that, it\’s only about a percentage of the game. Hey Luke, hey John, good to see you here brother. So emotional intelligence is great, \’cause it gives you awareness of what you\’re experiencing, however doesn\’t necessarily tell you what was the thought that I\’m thinking, what\’s the belief system, or the limiting beliefs or the fears that it\’s generating the thinking that then creates the emotion, so this is where a lot of the tools from NLP, and a lot of the tools from behavioural psychology come in handy because we can add, love the love thanks brother, we got to understand well, what is the thinking, what\’s the belief system, what\’s the habits, what\’s the conditioning, what are all the deeply ingrained unconscious beliefs and value systems that are driving the thoughts that create the emotions that create the decisions, create the actions, create the results, so the results are just a downstream consequence as a result of our model of the world, so that\’s the most important thing, so we need a recognisable, well let\’s look at an example, let\’s just say for example, we\’re experiencing anger. Anger is the downstream consequence, so anger is like a volcano erupting, so if you\’re experiencing anger, what you\’re experiencing is you\’re experiencing the lava pouring down the outside of the volcano. Now during the height of the emotion you\’re experiencing that volcano\’s just blind it\’s top and you\’re angry, but you got to look and say well hang on, what were the thoughts that were preceding that emotion and where was I out of alignment to such a degree or what do I believe about my reality or where am I not taking action, or how am I constructing my reality, such that I even produce the thought that then created the emotion of anger in the first place, so emotions are not just this random thing that happened to us, emotions are created by thinking patterns that are created by belief systems, by deeply ingrained belief systems, so we need to understand everything back up here in our model of the world to understand how I am now creating the emotion, so emotional intelligence fits here, now from emotional intelligence that gives us the awareness to then understand and be observer of okay, well what are my fears, what are my limiting beliefs, where are my clashes, where are my conflicts, where are all the, where are the areas where I out of alignment with my true self. That\’s the ability that emotional intelligence gives you, and as I said, it\’s only part of the game, the rest of this is now understanding what are all the patterns, things like limiting beliefs, fears, deeply ingrained fears, deeply ingrained conditions, conditioning, a lot of negative emotions, maybe trauma from childhood, and a lot of negative habits that we\’ve been cultivating and conditioning for a large part of our life, so we\’re going to now do some, we\’ve got go hunting, we got to go digging deeper to find out well what are these attributes, what is the condition belief systems that are now driving the thinking that then creates the emotions, so the emotions are downstream consequence as a result of what\’s actually stored or installed in our unconscious mind. Now our unconscious mind is the thing that runs our whole entire body, our unconscious mind is what drives 95 percent of our behaviour, so our unconscious mind is where everything is stored, it\’s like a deep software programme that\’s been installed on the computer, onto our body, now when we understand the unconscious mind, we\’re able to understand what\’s driving all that behaviour, so it\’s a really important principal, we obviously don\’t have time to drop deep into the unconscious mind, and all the facets of the unconscious mind, other than to say it\’s driving mostly our behaviour, \’cause our unconscious mind is the part of us that\’s beating our heart, it\’s running our immune system, its breathing us and all of our behaviour that we indulge in and that we create is created in our unconscious mind. That\’s a whole another Facebook live topic that we going to drop into it, I got your question here before, great question, how do you go about getting an EQ test. I can do an EQ test for you if you send me a message, I\’ve got, so I\’m trained in EQ, I have an assessment that you can do, it\’s really simple, it\’s an online quiz, it takes you probably less than, I think it\’s about 15 minutes to complete, and it\’s really simple. I can give you an unpack and explain all the different assessment areas, the five different pillars of EQ, the scores in each, and then it gives you 50 strategies on how to improve your emotional intelligence, so it\’s really an awesome test, and I recommend it for every single human being, if you want to be a more professional human being, do it, do yourself a favour, and get an yourself an EQ test, so hit me up from, drop me a comment if you\’d like to, if you\’d like to have that done , \’cause I can certainly help you out there and it will make a massive difference in your emotional intelligence, and your emotional mastery, your emotional world. So I\’m going to give you some really tangible steps here of what we\’ve talked about EQ, we talked about why it\’s important, we\’ve talked about what it is, we talked about how we\’re creating our results, which is all derived from our model of the world, how do we create our world, what\’s our perspective, what\’s our believe system that\’s been generating all of that. So let\’s make this really tangible, well how do we then improve our EQ, well the master skill is the most important thing,, thanks Heidi, the most important thing is self awareness. We need to be aware of what\’s unfolding within us, but then what we need, so the awareness is the space that we create for ourselves to observe what\’s unfolding for example how we\’re driven by fear, how we\’re driven by resistance, are we driven by judgement , are we driven by, those are the parts of the ego, are we driven by a limiting belief, what are the parts of this that we are being driven by, what is the conditioning, what is the programme that\’s unfolding within us. So we need to have a heightened level of self awareness, which is a skill. Self awareness is a skill that we can cultivate through practises like meditation, meditation is one of the most powerful practises that anyone can ever do, and it\’s not about just kind of sitting there in peace, and kind of feeling good, the benefit of meditation, there\’s so many benefits to meditation, there\’s so much science and research that\’s gone into meditation now, the major benefit for me, for my money, or the clients that I\’m working with that now we cultivate regular meditation practises is you become aware of what\’s unfolding within you, you become aware of your limitations, you become aware of the mental blocks, you become aware of the fears, you become aware of all the parts of you that are unfolding so you can now label them, you can document and you can describe what\’s unfolding in your reality and that\’s power, because if you\’re not aware of what\’s unfolding and what are all the thoughts that you have and on average we have 70,000 thoughts per day, just over one per second, we have 70,000 thoughts per day, so if you don\’t have the self awareness to recognise most or the majority of what are those thoughts, and how they\’re resourceful, and how they\’re unresourceful, they\’re based out of fear, they\’re based out of ego, are they based out of coming from our true high self, where are they based from, if we don\’t awareness of where most of my thoughts coming from, we\’re living unconsciously, it\’s like, where it\’s like you know when you drive to work and because you\’ve driven to work so many times, you don\’t even have to think, you don\’t have to think about turning left, right, you just do it automatically, well, if we go through our day without self awareness, without being presently connect, so I call it present state awareness, being truly connected to what we\’re experiencing then most of those 70000 thoughts are happening outside our awareness, and we could be thinking anything, we could be thinking we could be thinking limitation, we could be thinking fear, we could be thinking anxiety, we could be having all these negative thoughts and if you\’re not aware of them, then they are driving us, and instead of us controlling and creating our destiny and focusing on what we want, we just letting the patterns and the programmes in our, sorry, our unconscious mind drive us. So we need to be conscious of our thoughts, otherwise our unconscious mind is going to start just driving us, so our conscious mind is our way to access creating shifts of the deepest unconscious level, which is the source code, our unconscious mind is the source code of what\’s driving 95 percent of the behaviour, so we need to get access to uncover and bring to our conscious mind awareness of our unconscious mind, that is emotional mastery, that\’s the highest level of emotional mastery, when you understand more about your unconscious drivers, what are the unconscious conditioning, what\’s the unconscious patterns, where are the elements of the ego that are operating, what are the fears, what are the limitations, what are the memories that you\’ve got from early childhood when you\’re three, four, five years old that are still conditioning you and playing now as an adult, that\’s the next level beyond and deeper down the emotional mastery rabbit hole, and that\’s it, it\’s a journey well worth the trip. So we\’ve got to, so to make this really tangible, every day, I recommend keeping a journal, now it\’s not for the sake of just keeping a journal, the benefit of keeping a journal, the reason why you want to keep a journal is you want to document your experiences, you want to document what where the fears that I experience today, what were the limitations I experienced today , what were the challenges that I experienced today, maybe what were the conflicts, what were the elements where I feel uncomfortable, what was the, maybe if you felt guilt, sadness, anger, hurt, resentment, if you felt any of those emotions during the day, you want to capture that, you want to keep a record of that and then put on your diagnostic hat and go hang on, I just experienced negative emotions today, let\’s get to work on unpacking what the hell just happened there, so you can work back up the chain, and work out what\’s my mindset like in the sense that I\’m generating thoughts that are then creating negative disempowering emotions, so we got to be more intelligent of that, let\’s diagnose what\’s actually going on and journaling is one of the most powerful ways to be aware of what just happened in the day, \’cause as I said before, if we don\’t journal, if we don\’t reflect consciously on our experience of life, then we are in a trance, we just going to go through life destined to repeat the same mistakes over and over again, I think it was Einstein that said, you know when you do the same thing over and over and over expecting different results, you guys know the story it\’s the definition of insanity, so by documenting all of your experiences and your negative emotions, your fears, your limiting beliefs and all that on a daily basis, you\’re accelerating your evolution of your consciousness because you\’re now aware of what\’s unfolding, you now have a documented example of your experience, so you can work out, hang on, what was I doing, what\’s my limitations, what\’s my fears, what\’s my beliefs to then overcome that, because you can\’t overcome, you can\’t transform what you\’re not aware of, and if you don\’t journal, and if you don\’t reflect on your day, what you were experiencing, then you\’ll never become aware of it, you\’ll just be in a trance forever, doomed to repeat the same thing over and over and over again, so I trust that makes sense, I trust ran through the importance of journaling, not \’cause it\’s a nice thing to do, but because you\’re getting valuable data. Every day you\’re getting information reflected at you by your emotional experience, your emotion experience is the reflection, you were getting a reflection of where you\’re out of alignment completely. So every negative emotion that you experience, every element when you feel like you\’re out of alignment, keep note of that, that\’s gold, you\’re getting valuable data, your life is reflecting every single thing that you need to if you\’re aware and if you pay attention to what it is. Once you become aware of it, you can then understand it, once you understand, you can then make new decisions to move beyond it, but if you\’re not aware of it in the first place, if you\’re missing self awareness which is the most powerful skill which can be cultivated as I said through meditation, through setting alarms throughout your day to remind yourself to stay present, I have an alarm that goes off every hour to remind me to stay connected and present. Also doing breathing processes, that\’s one of the great, best ways to stay connected and stay present and stay aware is focusing on your breathing, because when you\’re focusing on your breathing, it brings awareness back to now, so awareness of breath is powerful, so I\’ve got meditation, I\’ve got journaling, another real powerful way is to actually document and describe the language of your experience, so what did you experience, what\’s the language around that \’cause a lot of people as I said before, people have fuzzy emotional experiences, when I say fuzzy, the don\’t know what they\’re feeling, well if you don\’t know what you\’re feeling, it\’s very difficult to become aware of it to then understand it to move beyond it, it just becomes something that\’s just uncomfortable, something that\’s fuzzy, something that\’s preventing you from being the best version of you, well when you can label it and define it using language, massive a-ha moment, you can then understand and move beyond it, so language creates our reality, and if we don\’t have language for our reality, then it just remains undefined, it remains in the realm of just, it just remains undefined, so you want to be able to define your reality. Thanks, awareness is key, so this is really tangible things to really practise and when you practise those on a consistent basis, your self awareness goes through the roof which means that your, your awareness goes through the roof, which means that your ability to observe all your patterns, your programmes, your fears, your limiting beliefs goes to another level which means you get access to I use the metaphor of have of taking off the hand brake, \’cause everyone is driving through life with a handbrake, whether be limiting beliefs, fears, there\’s stuff outside our awareness that we don\’t even know is holding us back, well, when you become, when you boost the skill of self awareness, you\’re able to become aware of which handbrakes are actually and there\’s multiple handbrakes and multiple different dimensions and multiple contexts, multiple patterns that are being, that are playing out that we are unconscious of, and I said when we become aware of what is unconscious and bring it to our conscious awareness we can resolve it, we can become aware of it, we can understand it, and we can move beyond it, but if we never become aware in the first place, we are being run by software, where it\’s like we are automatically run on a default, which is a very very, because we\’re not even aware of the patterns that we\’re running, we\’re just being run like a software programme, you know, input, output. Where I would interrupt the pattern here, by having self awareness, because we can now observe what\’s unfolding within us, we can observe the limitation, then we can move beyond is, so very very powerful. I want to leave it there guys, \’cause I want to just keep this really short and sharp. Thank you guys for tuning in, hey Bella hey dora, yeah, I can certainly do some EQ tests for you, send me a message, I\’ll hook up with you guys, and I can certainly help you out with that, that is not a problem at all. So guys I also just want to mention I have got my competition running for the next few weeks which is for my NLP five day NLP practitioner training, so for those of you that want to go into competition to win five day NLP practitioner, drop in the comments NLP me baby, yes, please drop the comments there NLP me baby, yes please, if you guys want to go in the draw to win an NLP practitioner five day training valued at 3,500 dollars, and I am also, for those of you whose heard, viewers in Perth, I\’m running NLP masterclass this Saturday, so if you want to come along to that event, you\’re going to get some absolute gold where I\’m taking all this and going to the next level, emotional intelligence, leadership, influence, how do we master everything in our life, you\’re welcome, it\’s a pleasure to share this, the information is the tools, this is the wisdom, this is the knowledge that needs to be shared with everyone, \’cause when everyone understands this, our life and our results and everything within our business goes to a whole new level, so it\’s a pleasure sharing it with you guys. Thank you so much for joining in, please if you\’ve got questions, if you got comments, if you have any requests for topics coming up, you guys are the reason why I\’m doing this, and I\’m here to serve, so if you do have questions, comments, please drop them in, send me a message, reach out, connect with me, I\’m always here to help, always here to offer whatever suggestions and insights and assistance I can, this is what I\’m here for. Trust you guys got value tonight, it\’s been an absolute pleasure and a privilege as always thank you for joining me for Transformation Tuesday, for emotional mastery, emotional intelligence, and I look forward to seeing you guys again next Tuesday. All the best, lots of love, wishing you guys an amazing week and thank you for tuning in everyone. Thanks, guys, thank you so much for the love, you guys are amazing, you guys are awesome, thanks for tuning in, I\’ll see you guys again soon, bye for now.

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